One day will hopefully be the only day that I ever act like a completely enraged, crazy bride. Today was that day. I keep wanting to say "kind of"--today was kind of that day--but it wasn't. It was that day.
As I've started gathering addresses for my [late] save-the-dates, my guest list has somehow managed to slowly creep up. Let's put it this way--the number is closer to 400 than it is to 300 if you know anything about rounding numbers, and I'm sure you do. I'm thinking maybe I should call my caterer, the wonderful Joy Tubb over at
Simply Joy Catering (don't you love how her name is part of her catering name?! I do. I could never use my name that way) and inquire about adding more food. Oh, heavens....
Several months ago, I finally decided on an invite, and lo and behold, it could be DIY-ed (is that how you even spell that?). So, last week when I uploaded it to order them, everything was off. The image was fuzzy. The text was on top of the image. Disaster. So, Nathan and I started looking at save-the-dates (yes, as I am getting addresses to mail them, jeez) and invitations AGAIN. I finally ended up finding a free image that fit our new save-the-date idea and combined it with some fantastic free fonts, which you can find at the bottom of the page, and we printed our save the dates today! I'm getting the last bit finished tomorrow and Tuesday, and hopefully they will be mailed this week! Finally!
So, I still need to figure out an invitation to use, but I think I have a few in mind. I need to make some adjustments to our favors, but that shouldn't be too terrible. Truth is, I am probably killing a lot of trees right now. Sorry trees!
My meltdown today resulted from all of the above plus the envelopes getting stuck in the printer...twice. We finally realized that strategy wouldn't work and resorted to clear labels, which I was really worried about using. Next, the labels would't work, but Nathan got all that figured out (thank you, dear!). To be honest, the envelopes look great, and the font I used, which is based off of someone else's actual handwriting, is nothing short of darling. The clear labels hardly show at all, so I say that is money well spent!
I didn't tell anyone else, so I'm not sure why I want to say it here, but part of the reason I flipped out today was because I began feeling like everything just looked horrible and cheap. I started thinking about people opening my save-the-dates, which are very reflective of one aspect of Nathan and me as a couple, and seeing them as cheap and uninviting rather than sweet and representative. Then that train of thought led to my invitations and then to my wedding as a whole. And then it hit me...
I don't care. I really don't. I have slowly warmed up to my wedding's current state. It's not really the wedding I ever imagined, but change is okay. It's a lot of what I wanted, and what other people want, on a much larger scale, but the truth is I just want to be married. Then I want to pack up all my dozens of blue Masons and scatter them all over my house and just relax. I came to realize that Nathan being so excited about our save-the-dates means a lot more to me than anyone else opening it up and thinking it is cheesy or cheap. It is cheap because I'm broke from spending my entire life (practically) in school. That, and I don't believe in spending every last dime I have or my parents have on a wedding because that simply isn't what weddings are about.
I am very happy to say that, as I told Nathan just the other night, that our wedding reminds me of the "Favorite Things Song" (as I fondly call it) that Julie Andrews sings on
The Sound of Music. I started off, even when planning a day in October, wanting a rustic, vintage affair, and while that is still very much our "theme," I think our focus is even more so on the things we love--Mason jars, books, burlap, blue, pink, sweet, fresh flowers, family heirlooms, our family and friends, and most of all, each other.
So, I have decided that it is okay that I am printing labels instead of torturing myself writing out addresses, having to unjam the printer a dozen times, or dropping cash on someone else torturing their own selves by writing out that many addresses. It is okay that my save-the-dates mean a lot more to Nathan and me than they ever will to anyone else. It is okay if things don't exactly match. It is okay...all of it. The people who love us will love us anyway. We will love each other. And, hopefully, one day, we'll laugh about that time when I jammed the printer twice and tried to pull out the envelope with tweezers (by the way, Nathan just took the back off the printer and pulled the jam right out, of course), became irrational (Nathan's words) just a little over printing onto labels and who knows what else, and dramatically proclaimed that nothing is working out. One day, it will just be funny.
And that is my day as a Bridezilla. Pray there are no others because I can really be such a grump, and who really wants to deal with a grumpy bride?